Wake Up

Wake Up, 

I know I've told people in my life, you have to pick who's important in your life, over the ones that aren't. Does this mean that you have already picked? Because that's what it seems like. Everything is falling apart at the edges and it scares me. Some days I feel like I can do this, I can be over him, I can let myself live without him, but some days I feel like I can't do anything without him, everything reminds me of him, I love him, I will never be able to let him go. My mind is confused I guess. My feelings are jumbled and I can't describe it. Am I seriously waiting for nothing? Have I been holding on for absolutely nothing? Have I just been wasting my tears and time on you? Please just show me you're not like every other guy. Please be different. You need to wake up and open your eyes, I don't believe that you've fallen in love with someone else. I believe you just covered up and masked the heartbreak with someone else and that you still love me deep inside. It's possible that it's VERY deep inside you but none the less, it's still there. I don't want to damage your relationship with her but dammit, Just text me back and at least tell me what she said. I know what the news is already by the way you're ignoring me but I want to at least hear it from your voice or words or whatever. Is that too much to ask? Love is confusing. I'm just going to sit here and wait for a prince charming to sweep me off my feet I guess. Whether it be you or not, I can only hope that he's as sweet and loving and caring as you USED to be. I'm almost excited to find someone new, if it'll ever happen, maybe then someone can teach me how to love and be loved properly. That would be fantastic. Just like my feelings, my future seems confused too, Sometimes I think that the future is bright and a bunch of things are just waiting to happen but sometimes I also feel like it's not going anywhere and never will and I'm just waiting on nothing. but I like to live by this saying "All it takes is 20 seconds of extreme courage" and basically you can do anything, I heard it in a movie, haha I have no clue which movie, nobody sue me. But yeah, It's true. If you can suck up just pure courage for 20 seconds and ask out the guy you think is cute, you can get so much in life! That's all it really takes. but gathering all that courage is the hard part no doubt. but think about it and that saying is very true, sometimes 20 seconds is all you need. I don't feel like writing a lot today, Too many things to think about and not enough to think about them! 

Whoever you are, Please just walk into my life already. And if you're already here, make yourself stand out to me. Thanks.