Say Anything

Say Anything, 

Do you ever have one of those days,
One of those days where you don't want to exist, don't want to be alive?
Today is one of those days, and every time these days come, I swear they get worse and worse.
I constantly feel like breaking down and screaming at everyone who is upsetting me, at everything that is upsetting me..
Time is going by so slow, and sometimes just too fast,
I realized today that I am afraid to date anyone else, I don't want to replace my feelings for you..
And with those thoughts in my head, it's impossible to move on, I'm afraid I'm going to be alone
for a very long, long time.
Nothing seems right anymore.
I rather just sit and cry, because there is nothing I can do
and I feel sometimes that my efforts are utterly wasted on you,
sometimes I feel like you're going to dump her and just run into my arms again...
I wish I could see into the future, to see whats going to happen,
to see if I should just keep pushing,
to see if it's going to pay off in the end.
Theres nobody to talk to anymore,
I have friends but I don't want to talk to anyone..
I desperately need to talk, but I don't want to,
conflicted.. too conflicted.
My emotions are just so fucked up, I don't know what is wrong with me, honestly...
I feel so messed up, I think I broke myself permanently..
I can't fall back into depression, I promised myself I wouldn't..
but I can't help it that I'm in love with you...
You helped me the first time.. but this time you're ruining me?
I can't believe you don't see what you're doing to me...
I can't force you into anything but I just fucking wish that you could love me
or just anybody love me...
I need it.
I need some sort of love,
I need someone to come and hug me and tell me that everything will be okay,
because nothing feels okay.
It hurts,
And tears don't stop.
And the nights spent alone don't help.
I'm relying on you for everything and you can't even give me a text back..
I swear you're literally driving me insane..